Every now and then, I leave behind my coil-bound cookbooks from the ‘70s and ‘80s and venture into the world to seek out modern day caker recipes. I guess I'm a glutton for punishment. But they’re not that hard to find. I just look for words like “weekday” or “time-saver” or “1-2-3” in the title.
Recently, I picked up a copy of Woman’s World magazine because it's important to know what the heck is going on in a woman's world these days. Based on what I read, there's a lot of eating, dieting, hairdos, dieting, fall canning parties and dieting. Woman's World readers also seem to like exclamation marks! I counted 187 in one issue alone!
I came across the Franks-and-Beans Pasta Bake and thought I’d give it a whirl. I mean, do I need a reason to cook with barbeque sauce? It tasted pretty good. It was tangy and reminded me of summer. But my Eye-talian taste tester made me promise to never mix pasta with barbeque sauce again. I guess it crossed a line.
Anyways, at 544 calories, 21 grams of fat, 24 grams of sugar and 1,241 milligrammes of sodium per serving, all I can say is good luck with the diet!!!!!!!
8 ounces wagon wheel or rotelle pasta (see note 1)
1 ¼ cups barbeque sauce
¾ cup tomato juice
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
2 teaspoons dry mustard powder
1 tablespoon oil
1 onion, chopped
1 can (15 ounces) cannellini beans, rinsed, drained
4 hot dogs, cut into 1/2” pieces
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese, 4 ounces
Preheat oven to 350°. Coat 2-qt. baking dish with cooking spray. Cook pasta according to package directions; drain. Meanwhile, combine barbeque sauce, tomato juice, Worcestershire and mustard powder. In large, non-stick skillet, heat oil over medium heat. Add onion; cook stirring occasionally, until softened, 7-8 minutes. Add barbeque sauce mixture, beans and hot dogs; cook, stirring occasionally until heated through, 2-3 minutes. Remove from heat. Stir in pasta. Transfer to baking dish; sprinkle with cheese. Bake 20-25 minutes or until bubbly and heated through. (See note 2)
Note 1: I couldn’t find wagon wheels, so I used pasta called “radiators.” What other pasta shapes are out there? Carburetors?
Note 2: Best eaten to Cher.
Source: Woman’s World, October 7 edition
This Monday, Canadian cakers across the land will put on their buckled black shoes, dust off their decorative corn centre pieces and gather round the Thanksgiving table. Sorry, Americans. You’ve still got a few weeks to go before the Peanuts special airs.
If you’re not sure what to make for Thanksgiving dinner, I’ve put together a menu of previously featured recipes that are sure to please every caker at your table. I didn’t include a turkey because, in my family, we could never afford one. Dad just went out and shot the biggest pigeon he could find.
From my caker house to yours, may your cornucopia be full of canned corn, Stove Top stuffing and Tums.
Cheese Cookies
Set up the TV tables, put on your “Kiss the Caker” apron and pass around these savory little ditties. Cakers like them because they have the word “cookie” in the name.
Green Bean Casserole
You can’t go wrong with this tried-and-true classic. Canned beans, cream of mushroom soup and deep fried onion things. The only thing you’ll regret is not making more. Well, that plus the gas.
Potato Casserole
This was my favourite dish of 2012. You have to cut up the potatoes which takes time, but that’s what aunts are for. I’m making this for my Thanksgiving dinner and since no aunts will be there, I’ll get my elderly mother to cut the potatoes. It’s important to make seniors feel needed. Watch for thumbs, though!
Isabel’s 5-Cup Salad/Dessert
Is it a dessert? A salad? Who cares? It's all going down the same hole. Besides, no caker Thanksgiving is complete without miniature marshmallows.
JELL-O Pineapple Rings
My mom made these all the time. If you don't like pineapple, just suck the JELL-O part off.
Pumpkin Dessert
There’s no better way to polish off a meal than with a big helping of pumpkin pah. But who's got time to buy a crust? This Pumpkin Dessert is a cinch. Serve with a cup of Folgers. Remember: it’s three parts Cool Whip to one part dessert.
It’s a fact: cakers love country. I’m talking hair piled high as a three-tier wedding cake, rhinestone-crusted polyester and pilgrimages to Branson, Missouri. In fact, many caker kids grew up dreaming that our Dolly Parton impersonations would one day make it all the way to The Tommy Hunter Show. Well, one of us did, anyway.
So naturally when I came across this recipe for Barbara Mandrell’s Pig Out Cake, I immediately put down my banjo, spit out the wheat sheaf and set to work. Not that there was a lot of work involved. Barbara’s a simple country gal, after all. And a helluva baker to boot. Her Pig Out Cake had me squealing in all the right ways.
I ate it while watching episodes of The Barbara Mandrell and the Mandrell Sisters Show (now there’s a mouthful) and wondered three things: Was Barbara related to Donna Mills? Was Louise related to Katy Perry? And does Irlene ever regret not putting out an album of her greatest xylophone hits?
1 box yellow pudding cake mix (see note)
½ cup oil
4 eggs
2 cans mandarin oranges, drained (save the juice)
Add enough water to the mandarin orange liquid required for the cake mix, add oil and eggs. Mix well, fold in oranges. Bake in 9 x 13 inch pan at 325° for 35 minutes.
Frosting
1-20 ounce can crushed pineapple with juice
1-4 ounce pkg. instant vanilla pudding
1-8 ounce Cool Whip
Mix and spread over cooled cake.
Note: I accidentally bought the non-pudding kind. Don't tell Barbara. I don't know if it made a difference.
Source: National Mfg. Co. 1901-2001 Centennial Cookbook
Well, here we are – the final recipe of Reader Month. What a dark incredible journey it’s been! I got intimate with Candle Salad, learned the ins and outs of Ice Cream Bread and even lost five pounds in an hour, courtesy of Mushroom Fluff.
I saved the most challenging recipe for last. This one was sent to me by Jennifer from the February 1954 edition of McCall's magazine. I know cutting a donut in half and inserting a piece of cheese may seem complicated, but just follow the instructions carefully and give yourself plenty of time. You can do this!
Actually, I posted this to prove a point. Everyone’s going on about weird food combinations these days, like chocolate-dipped bacon or marshmallow-crusted chicken or salads with shards of glass. But this recipe proves people have been doing stupid things with food for a very long time. It reminds me of that old saying: What goes around will come around again even though people think it's the first time they've seen it. That makes sense, right?
Thanks to everyone who submitted a recipe. If I didn’t get to yours, it doesn’t mean I won’t feature it in the coming months so keep your eyes peeled. If you’ve got a recipe you want to share, email cakercooking at gmail dot com.
Directions: Take a donut. Cut it in half. Put a piece of cheese in it. Eat it.
Source: Caker Jennifer via McCall’s
(Click the image to see a larger version of the ad. It's worth it.)
We continue riding the carousel of gaiety that is Reader Recipe month with MushTun Toast, courtesy of Marie-Claude.
Before going any further, you may want to grab some clip-on sunglasses to shield your eyes from this kaleidoscope of colours. Just look at nature’s majesty! Why, there's brown. And, well, some light grey. And, uh, dark grey.
MushTun Toast reminds me of Chicken à la King which many caker kids ate for lunch on Saturdays. It came in a can and was also served on toast. Then there was Mock Chicken à la King for poor caker kids who couldn’t afford chicken. Or mushrooms. Or even toast. Sadly, those kids had to eat a paper towel smeared with Crisco while wearing potato sacks and humming the theme song from The Little Rascals. Isn't poverty the worst?
Marie-Claude was considerate enough to point out that MushTun Toast should be eaten with a knife and fork. I usually stick to the ol’ spatula and cheese grater when I dine, but maybe I’m more of a renaissance kind o' guy.
Thanks, Marie-Claude! Y'all come back on Monday for the final reader recipe of the month.
1 can of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup
1 can of tuna
Bread for toast
Mix cream of mushroom and tuna in a pot and heat until it boils. Stir often. Make some toast and add the mixture on it. Use fork and knife to eat.
Source: Caker Marie-Claude
When reader Bernice sent me some recipes from her mother’s New Zealand church cookbook, I was pretty pumped. I mean, these recipes came from cakers who lived across the world. Considering the farthest I’ve been is across the street, you can imagine how National Geographic-ish I felt as I set out to make Mushroom Fluff.
Ever get the sense that something’s not right when you take it out of the oven? I suppose that applies to most caker food. But in this case, things seemed more "off" than usual. Mushroom Fluff came out looking more like mushroom soup. But, being the trooper I am, I dug in.
A half hour later, the fluff started flopping. Like, real bad. I haven’t moved that fast since Sears had a sale on Wrangler jeans. Naturally, I was mortified when the police showed up at my door. The neighbours had called to report sounds of a “violent commotion.” I couldn’t apologize enough to the police officers and offered to make a caker candy tree for their next fundraiser.
Was it the eggs? The milk? Was it not cooked enough? Who knows? Bernice, I wish I could say my first experience with New Zealand caker food was a good one. But the next time fluff comes a’knockin’, I ain’t a’answerin'.
1 tin mushroom soup
4 ounces grated cheese
½ teacup of milk (see note)
2 eggs
Stir together the soup, the cheese, the milk and the egg yolks. Beat egg whites stiffly and fold gently into mixture. Place in greased dish and bake in hot oven (400 degrees) for 30 minutes.
Note: I assumed this was a ½ cup, but maybe the measurements are different in New Zealand. That might’ve explained the soupiness.
Source: Hataitai Methodist Church, 1964
For many cakers, there's no better way to top off a big serving of Candle Salad than with some chocolate (and possibly a cigarette). So I thought this would be the perfect time to post a recipe I received from a reader named Polly.
Polly emailed me to say that she’d put together a book of her favourite recipes for her kids. I think that’s a great idea. I wish my mom had done the same. Instead, she handed me a can opener one day and said, “Best of luck, kiddo.”
I picked Polly’s chocolate chipper cake to make for obvious reasons. However, I took some issue with the fact that it calls for cooked pudding, not instant. “Cooked?!?” I said to myself, running to the calendar to check what century we're living in. Was Polly expecting me to wear a crinoline while making it, too?
Yes, cooking the pudding stole a good portion of my life that I’ll never get back. However, all that sweat and arm motion (I believe it’s called “stirring”) was worth it. Chocolate chipper cake was probably one of the best cakes I’ve ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten a lot of cake in my day, m'kay?
Polly, your kids are lucky to have these recipes. Now I’m lucky, too. Thanks for sharing.
Have YOU got a caker recipe you’re itching to share? Email me at cakercooking at gmail dot com.
1 large package chocolate pudding mix - The kind you cook, NOT INSTANT (See note 1)
3 cups milk
1 box chocolate cake mix
1 12 oz pkg chocolate chips
Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour a 9 X 13 pan. Prepare pudding mix according to package instructions. (See note 2) It is faster and easier to follow the microwave directions to cook the pudding. (See note 3) Stir cake mix into pudding until well blended. Pour into pan and sprinkle with chocolate chips. Bake for 30 minutes. Best if served warm.
Note 1: POLLY'S CAPS, NOT MINE
Note 2: Give yourself lots of time for this step. You may miss your child’s graduation. That’s all I’m saying.
Note 3: I CAN'T AFFORD A MICROWAVE
Source: Caker Polly
