Homemade Stove Top Stuffing

Welcome to Caker Cooking’s Caker Christmas Extravaganza!

I’ll post questionable scrumptious caker holiday recipes throughout the month. In addition, I'll also post craft ideas. Don't worry if you're not Michael Angelo. Caker crafts are super-easy and make great gifts for co-workers and other people you sort of care about.

In the three and a half years I’ve been doing this blog, I’ve learned a few things about my fellow cakers. Mainly, that we like man-made fibres and consider Hee Haw high art. Another thing I've learned about cakers? We're perplexing creatures. When I saw this recipe for homemade Stove Top Stuffing, I took my Tilley hat off and gave my head a scratch. I mean, why? Why would cakers go through all the trouble of making something when they could just buy a box?

The answer? Pride. Cakers like nothing more than boasting that processed food isn't limited to the supermarket. You can also make it in the comfort of your own wallpaper-bordered kitchen.

Now, I consider myself a stuffing connoisseur, so I was doubtful about this recipe. But it was delicious and tasted just like the real thing. If you can consider something that's fake real. (Ouch, that thought just hurt my head!) It was salty and savoury and, best of all, I didn’t have to buy a turkey to cook it in. Or even a pigeon, which, in my family, was all we could afford at Christmas.

Yours truly,

Tiny Tim

P.S. Come back Wednesday for a special – and salty! – caker Christmas craft!

1 envelope Lipton Onion Soup Mix
1 cup water
8 cups bread crumbs (cut into ¼” pieces)
1 teaspoon poultry season
½ cup butter

In medium saucepan, add Lipton Onion soup mix to water; bring to boil and simmer 5 min. Stir in poultry seasoning and butter and set aside. Toast bread cubes lightly in moderate over till cubes are dry. In large bowl, add seasoned onion mix gradually to bread cubes, tossing lightly till coated. Return stuffing to saucepan, cover and let stand in warm for 5 min., stirring occasionally.


Source: Madoc Centennial Cookbook - 1978

Taco Salad

I used to love when my Michigan relatives came for a visit. We’d send my uncle off to the park in the morning to reserve a picnic table (and clean off the bird poop). A few hours later, the Americans would arrive in their visors and Detroit Tigers hats, car trunks loaded up with boxes of chips and buckets of Kentucky Fried Chicken, announcing, “Oh my gad! Can someone get Bannie a pap?”

It was Bonnie, in fact, who first introduced me to Taco Salad. I remember the exact moment she brought out the bowl, tore open a bag of Doritos, crushed them up and poured them in. “Cheez of Whiz," I thought. “Them American cakers know how to do things right.”

Perfect for a summer picnic, Taco Salad (not to be confused with the equally delicious Taco Salad Casserole) combines ground beef, cheese, iceberg lettuce, and yes, Doritos. I’m warning you ahead of time – you won’t be able to stop eating this. Make sure there are other people around. Otherwise, your tears will make the Doritos all soggy.

4 tomatoes, chopped
1 onion, chopped (see note)
1 pound ground beef, cooked
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 bag crushed Doritos
1 head lettuce
250 ml bottle Catalina salad dressing

Prepare everything ahead of time. Mix everything together approximately five minutes before serving. (This salad is great for large gatherings. Even half this recipe makes a large salad suitable for a family of four.)

Note: My taste testers found the onion a bit strong. I used white onion. They suggested green onions might be better. Whatever. Everyone’s a critic.

Source: What’s Cooking at St. Joseph

Broccoli Soufflé

Like Blanche Dubois, I’ve always depended on the kindness of strangers. (I’ve sometimes depended on their money, but that’s a whole other blog post.) So when a pair of Caker Cooking readers sent me a cookbook they found at a garage sale, I was reminded of the (Eagle Brand Sweetened Condensed) milk of human kindness.

I’ve mentioned before how much cakers love broccoli and this soufflé (taken from the cookbook) was a triple threat of “Hot Damn!” I’m talking Cream of Mushroom soup, broccoli and Velveeta! In fact, it was so good, it didn’t even make it as far as the kitchen table. I inhaled it at the counter.

The other day, the pair announced their engagement and that got me thinking pretty deeply. Marriage and broccoli soufflé share some similarities.

1) Both take the right mix of ingredients
2) Sometimes both are so good you can’t make it as far as the kitchen table
3) Both can leave you gassy (but it usually clears up by morning)

Now if only Mother would get off my back about the whole finding-the-right-girl thing with me. Apparently, there’s a bow-legged third cousin with an under bite that Mother feels is a good candidate, but I'm standing up to her. For once.

Paul and Bianca, congratulations. And may your soufflés always rise high.

1 bunch broccoli
1 can cream of mushroom soup
3 well-beaten eggs
½ cup butter, melted
1 medium onion, chopped
8 crushed soda crackers
¾ cup Hellman’s mayonnaise
1 cup grated Velveeta cheese

Cut up and cook broccoli until tender. Mix together soup, eggs, mayonnaise, onion, melted butter and cheese. Add ½ of crushed crackers. Add chopped broccoli and mix well. Put in casserole dish. Add remaining crackers on top. Bake, uncovered, for 30 minutes at 350°.

Note: I cooked it closer to 40 minutes.

Source: What’s Cooking at St. Joseph

Church Lady Casserole Challenge

Recently, I was asked participate in a Church Lady Casserole Challenge with four other food bloggers: Mimi makes vintage Weight Watchers recipes, Retro Ruth blogs about all things mid-century, Yinzerella dishes up recipes from a plastic, guacamole-coloured box and Erica tests out retro recipes. We all dug deep into our collections and passed along a recipe for someone else to make.

I got stuck with the super-exciting-sounding “Potato Casserole,” courtesy of Mimi. Look, I’m the last one to throw stones at anyone’s culinary habits, but come on. How good could a potato, white bread and Velveeta casserole be? Besides, I’d already featured Schwartzies Hash Browns on the blog and if anyone knows cheesy potato goodness, it’s cakers. Right? 

Wrong.

Fellow cakers, we have been beaten. Potato Casserole kicks Schwartzies’ ass to the curb. This is simply the best potato casserole I’ve ever tasted. It's like I fell in love with it. When I was away from it, I couldn't wait to get back to it. I put it under my pillow at night. I even considered dating it, but that’s a whole other blog post.

Just do yourself a favour and put Potato Casserole on your bucket list. You won't regret it. So long as it's not thong season, m'kay?

Check out the other casserole recipes made by my lovely colleagues:

Lazy Bride’s Dish (made by Erica)
Anything Anytime Casserole (made by Mimi)
Sausage Apple Noodle Casserole (made by Ruth)
Cock-A-Doodle Casserole (made by Yinzerella)

Any guesses which casserole was the one I submitted? 

Just look at all the burnt cheesy goodness.

Potato Casserole
10 medium or 8 large potatoes, peeled, diced and cooked

1 large onion, chopped

4 slices fresh white bread, cubed

½ pound Velveeta cheese, diced (half the box)

1 tablespoon salt

¼ teaspoon pepper

2 tablespoons parsley flakes

Mix all together and put in 9” x 13” pan. Melt 1 cup margarine in 1 cup milk. Pour over potato mixture and cover with foil. Refrigerate overnight. Sprinkle with 1 cup crushed Corn Flakes or Ritz crackers before baking. Bake at 375° uncovered for 45 minutes. Serve hot.

Source: Our Best Home Cooking, Polish Civic Hall Association of Pittsburgh

Schwartzies Hash Browns

Ah, the caker potluck. Is there anything more rewarding than getting invited to someone’s house for dinner and having to provide the food? Consider yourself lucky if your caker host even washes your dish at the end of the night. (Most of us just give a half-hearted rinse before sending you on your way.)

I have no clue who or what a “Schwartzie” is, but these hash browns have been a fixture at caker potlucks since the invention of the can opener. (True story – when I told my mom I was making them, she asked, “Are you going to someone’s house for dinner?”)

Be warned: this is comfort food at its finest. You may want to keep it for yourself.

2 pounds frozen hash browns (see note 1)
¼ cup sour cream
2 cups cream of mushroom soup (see note 2)
Salt and pepper
½ cup melted butter or margarine
1 diced onion
2 cups grated cheddar cheese
Parmesan cheese

Heat oven to 350°. Thaw potatoes slightly for easier mixing. Mix all ingredients, except Parmesan cheese, in a 9"x13” dish. Sprinkle Parmesan on top. Bake for 1-1 ½ hours.

Note 1: The bag I bought at the grocery store was just over two pounds.

Note 2: I just threw both cans in.

Source: St. Mary’s C.W.L. Grafton Cookbook

JELL-O Pineapple Rings

Here's a nifty caker side dish that my mom used to serve alongside Sunday hams. Even though nothing made me gag more than a pink, simmered ham, I never had any trouble downing a few of these JELL-O pineapple rings.

Hmm. Wonder if the sugar had anything to do with it.

Drain a can of pineapple rings and fill with JELL-O.

Chill. When set, slide a knife around the edge and shake it out.

Slice and serve. So pretty you may want to wear it as jewellery.

Delicious Corn Bake

In my Caker FAQ section, I noted that one of the three defining characteristics of caker food is “ease.” Cakers don’t do complicated food. Our lives are complicated enough.

Take, for example, this Delicious Corn Bake. (I was itching to rename it “Caker Corn Bake,” but the purist in me needs to stay true to the original recipes.) Never before has “ease” been so well defined than in this medley of Cheez Whiz, macaroni and not one but two types of corn.

The best part? You don’t even have to cook the macaroni. The water from the undrained can of corn does all the work. Just because you’re not complicated doesn’t mean you're not clever.

1 can kernel corn, undrained

1 can creamed corn

1 cup uncooked macaroni

1 cup Cheez Whiz

Heat oven to 350°. Combine all ingredients. Mix well. Place into a two quart casserole dish. Cover and bake for about 45 minutes or until macaroni is done.

Comments? Questions? Recipe requests? Feel free to leave them.

Source: The Best of Enbridge

Peanut Butter Cauliflower Casserole

While I may wax poetic on the numerous merits of caker cooking (the taste, the ease, the strangely filling sensation for hours afterwards), you’ll never hear me say that caker cooking is esthetically pleasing. It’s not. Caker food is some of the butt-ugliest food you’ll ever come across.

Take this Peanut Butter Cauliflower casserole for example. If this dish was a person, you’d say it had a face for radio. This casserole made its debut at Caker Christmas 2010 and was met with some resistance. (Let’s face it—that’s true of most caker dishes.) But it tasted great.

Don’t believe me? Try it for yourself. Just keep your eyes closed while eating.

1 cup cauliflower (in florets)

1 cup chopped green pepper

½ cup sliced onion

3 tablespoons butter

3 tablespoons flour

1 ½ cups milk

Dash of Tabasco and pepper

¾ cup grated cheddar cheese

½ cup peanut butter

¼ cup grated cheddar cheese

Pimento strips (optional)

Heat over to 350°.

Cook cauliflower, green pepper and onion in a pan for 10 minutes, then place in a greased casserole dish. In a saucepan, blend butter and flour and gradually add milk. Bring to a boil. Cook for 1 minute. Stir in Tabasco, pepper and cheddar cheese. Pour the sauce over the cauliflower. Add drops of peanut butter on top to jeuge it up.

Bake for 25 minutes. Sprinkle with ¼ cup grated cheese and bake for another 5 minutes. Garnish with pimento strips.

Source: "Let's Break Bread Together," The United Churches in Canada