Look, there’s no point beating around the bush – everyone suffers from constipation from time to time. But for cakers, getting bunged up is simply a fact of our everyday lives. It explains why so many of us walk around with that pinched look on our faces.
It’s no wonder traffic can get a little congested with all the processed, synthetic and non-green foods we cakers consume. But, thankfully, here’s a recipe guaranteed to get the lead out. So to speak.
Some of you may find making muffins with beans a little disturbing. But how is it any different than that Jessica Seinfeld book where she put things like spinach in brownies and bean sprouts in pudding? (Or whatever it was she did.)
As to how these muffins taste, I have to say not too bad. Kind of like mini Tomato Soup Cakes. In fact, I’ve already eaten thr–
Er…excuse me for a moment. Nature's calling.
1 cup raisins
1 cup boiling water
1 cup oil
2 cups white sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup walnuts
1 14-ounce can beans in tomato sauce
½ teaspoon salt
3 cups flour
1 teaspoon soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
½ teaspoon baking powder
Mix raisins with boiling water. Stir and set aside. Beat eggs, oil, sugar, vanilla and beans until beans are broken. Add flour and remaining ingredients, including raisins and water. Mix well. Spoon batter into large paper muffin cups. Bake at 325º for 30 minutes.
Source: Centennial Central Cook Book
Do you ever find yourself sitting in a dusty rose La-Z-Boy recliner, wearing your housecoat, sipping a glass of white zinfandel and wondering, “Whatever happened to JELL-O Pudding Pops?”
It’s a mystery that has haunted me for years. But now that I’ve found this recipe, I have closure. These icy treats are somewhere between a Fudgsicle and a Pudding Pop. Best of all? Two ingredients!
I had a hard time finding popsicle molds but got these at Crate and Barrel. If you're desperate, you can always fall back on the ol' Tupperware cup and spoon.
1 4-ounce package instant chocolate pudding
2 ½ cups milk
Mix as directed on pudding package. Pour into popsicle molds and freeze.
Source: Centennial Central School Cook Book
A few weeks back, I christened a woman named Carmelle the “Caker Queen” because I’d featured two of her recipes on Caker Cooking. But I was a bit hasty in that declaration because if there’s anyone who deserves that title, it’s my mom.
It was she, after all, who set me on my caker path. To think of everything I’ve learned from this woman – that you can serve salads with marshmallows alongside roast beef. Or solidify pineapple rings in JELL-O. Or turn a cereal box into a gift box. To this day, the sound of someone routing through a kitchen drawer looking for a can opener is music to my ears.
My mom’s getting older and nowadays even casseroles can seem like too much work. So this past weekend, I did what any respectable son-of-a-caker would do: I went for a visit and made her Macaroni Casserole.
Of all the casseroles my mom made throughout the years (and believe me, there were many), this is my favourite. I don’t know why it’s so good. Maybe it’s the tomato soup. Or the elbow macaroni. Or maybe, it’s just mom.
As an added bonus this week, I’ve included another one of my mom’s recipes. Her molasses cookies aren’t technically caker, but they kick butt. And the ones I brought her this weekend got the thumbs up. So consider the caker torch officially passed.
Carmelle, I hope you’re OK with a title change. The bottom line is that there should only be one queen in your life – and that's mom.
1 package ground beef
2 cups dry elbow macaroni
2 cans tomato soup
Minced onion (optional)
Brown the ground beef and onion until cooked. Salt and pepper to taste. Boil the macaroni to desired firmness and drain. Mix together the beef, macaroni and tomato soup. Put in casserole dish. Top with Paramesan cheese. Bake, covered, at 375° for about a half hour or until bubbly and cheese is melted.
Mom’s Molasses Cookies
1 cup sugar
¾ cup shortening (see note)
¼ cup molasses
2 cups flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
¼ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ginger
1 teaspoon cloves
1 teaspoon cinnamon
Mix together. Roll in balls and dip in sugar. Bake for 15 minutes at 350°.
Note: My ass can’t do the shortening. So I use unsalted butter.
Source: The Caker Queen
Forever a glamour gal.
My fellow blogger extraordinaire, Mimi, recently invited me to participate in her Weight Watchers retro potluck extravaganza.
I was responsible for the cocktails. Unfortunately.
To find out why, check out my post here.
I know you’re out there – you love caker food, but keep it your dark, dirty secret. During the day, you dine on things like bok choy and lentils, but when you come home at night, you’re spooning Marshmallow Fluff straight from the jar. You might as well face it – you’re a closet caker.
What you need is a recipe that helps you bring your love of caker food out into the open; a dish that washes the shame away. Easy Brunch Eggs are here to the rescue. If Martha Stewart ever came to my house for breakfast (and stranger things have happened in my life), I wouldn’t think twice about serving these to her. Heck, she'd probably ask for ketchup.
Just look at these beauts! And who’d ever guess there were only three ingredients? (Martha certainly wouldn’t.) I even put some long, narrow vegetable things next to them to make everything look more sophisticated.
The only thing missing from this dish? The closet, my caker friends. But you’re better off without it.
12, or more, slices of any bread (See Note 1)
12 eggs, or more
Butter or margarine
Salt and pepper to taste
Lightly spray muffin pan with Pam. Butter sliced bread lightly. Place bread, buttered side up, in muffin cups. Do not tear bread. In the centre of bread, break egg. Add salt and pepper and toppings if desired. i.e. bacon bits, cheese, chives (See Note 2). Bake for 10 minutes at 350º until bread is golden brown and egg white is firm (See Note 3). Yummy and easy.
Note 1: I cut the crusts off because I thought they’d look nicer. I dealt with some egg spillage, but I don't know if the keeping the crusts on would help or not. In any case, things were a little messy, but not overly bad.
Note 2: I spread a little Dijon mustard on the bread and topped them with cheddar cheese. Delish!
Note 3: I prefer my yolks on the firm side, so I left them in closer to 15-20 minutes.
Source: Treasured Recipes, Birr United Church
When it comes to food flavourings, I think lemon sucks. Maybe my nose has been victimized by too much furniture polish, dishwashing detergent, floor cleaner and scented plastic dolls over the years, but I just don’t find anything appealing about it.
So I was less than enthusiastic about making Lemon Fluff. It sounded boring. But then I started making it and, as the cold, evaporated milk foamed up, I had a memory trigger. I'd eaten this before. And then I realized – I frigging love Lemon Fluff!
Although it doesn’t sound like much, Lemon Fluff is three inches of light, moussey – and yes – lemony heaven. It’s perfect for summer eating and guaranteed to shine a light in the dimmest of church basements. Lemon, thou art redeemed.
1 package lemon JELL-O powder
1 ½ cups boiling water
4 tablespoons lemon juice
Rind of 1 lemon
¼ cup sugar
1 can Carnation evaporated milk (real cold)
¼ cup sugar
1 cup graham crumbs
A little butter
Mix together ¼ cup sugar, the graham crumbs and butter. Press into bottom of an 8"x8” pan, saving a few crumbs for top. Mix JELL-O powder and boiling water. Cool slightly. Add the lemon juice, rind and ¼ cup sugar. Cool in refrigerator until syrupy. Beat can of Carnation milk. Beat again and add the JELL-O mixture. Combine beating until stiff. Pour over crumb crust and sprinkle with reserved crumbs.
Source: Cooking with Durham County Junior Farmers
Cakers have a hard time making decisions, especially when it comes to their food. You can usually spot us in the grocery store aisles, looking like we’re at a tennis match. Are we in the mood for bologna or macaroni loaf? Does the recipe call for a can of crushed pineapple or a can of pineapple tidbits? And what the heck is all that green, leafy stuff?
So you can imagine how paralyzing it is when cakers are faced with the ultimate snack showdown: salty vs. sweet. Luckily, there are visionairies who walk among us (well, church women in Wisconsin, anyway) who single-handedly bridged that divide with a cookie that delivers a pinch of sweet followed by a slap of salt. Oh, and a little butter. As in two sticks. But if they ain't counting calories in Wisconsin, I suggest you don't bother, either.
When I taste-tested these cookies, the reaction was a bit mixed. Some people were puzzled. Why add potato chips to cookies, they wondered? But others who tried them – namely cakers – loved ‘em. It was one less decision they'd have to make that day.
½ cup sugar
2 sticks butter
½ cup crushed potato chips (See Note 1)
1 cup pecans
2 cups flour
Heat over to 350°. Mix all ingredients and roll into balls. Flatten with the bottom of a glass on a cookie sheet. (See Note 2)
Note 1: I went with plain chips, but to add some more texture, I'd recommend using rippled.
Note 2: It doesn't give a cooking time. I left them in for about 10 minutes or so.
Source: The recipe book is from Wisconsin, but doesn't have a cover, so I've christened it "Coverless Wisconsin Cookbook."